Ask Doristine Sankey how many children she and her husband, Charlie, have and she’ll pause to count.
The Sankeys have been foster parents to more children than she has fingers to count them on. They have two daughters of their own, 15 years apart. So, when the couple considered bringing a foster child into their home when their younger daughter, Ebony, was four years old, that was a lot to think about.
“Kim was five years old and she and Ebony grew up like sisters,” Sankey said. “They were like two peas in a pod. They did everything together. They were cheerleaders together and played basketball together. Kim was our daughter, too.”
The Sankeys were never able to adopt Kim. Their relationship was defined as a “long-term guardianship.”
“But no matter what it is called, Kim is our daughter and we are so proud of her,” Sankey said. “We have relatives in the Chicago area and, after college, she went up there with them. She has a degree in broadcasting and works for WGN in Chicago.”
Over the years that the Sankeys were raising their own daughters and their foster daughter, they were also foster parents to a large number of children.
“Some of the children stayed with us only a short time and others lived with us for three to six years,” Sankey said. “It was always sad when the children had to go because we formed a bond with them. When they left, there was a void in our lives. But, we hear from all of them often and they always get in touch some way on Mother’s Day. That makes it a real special day for me.”
But Sankey isn’t suffering from the empty nest syndrome. She keeps too busy for that. She has her own two daughters, Ebony and Jackie and, then, there is Victoria – and the other Harrison children, ten in all.
“The Harrison children’s mother wasn’t able to take care of them and they were split up and in foster homes in Greenville, Geneva, Enterprise and Mobile,” Sankey said. “Charlie and I were asked to be a host family for the children. I already knew Victoria. I had seen her when she was in daycare at Shellhorn. She fell off the slide and I helped her up and held her for a few minutes. So, when I heard later that the children had been placed in foster homes and were not together, I wanted to do what we could to help them stay connected.”
For about eight years, the Sankeys were the host family for the Harrison children and Victoria became like one of their own.
Every Thanksgiving and Christmas the Sankeys hosted the children at their home, usually for a weekend. They also hosted them at other times during the year.
“That was a way to keep the children connected,” she said. “Now they are all grown, so they get together on their own. But I keep a check on all of them — to keep them on the straight and narrow. But Victoria remains a part of our family.”
Victoria said the Sankeys will always be her family and Doristine will always be a mama to her.
“I love my mama,” Victoria said casting a smile at Sankey. “She is my best friend. She takes care of me. We do all kinds of things together, like grocery shopping and just sitting on the porch talking. She loves me and I love her.”
Sankey said she and Victoria have a mother-daughter relationship and she feels a strong connection to her.
“When I had breast cancer, I realized that Victoria had to be able to take care of herself. She had to be able to live independently and to manage on her own.”
Sankey began working toward independence for Victoria.
Today, Victoria is living independently in an apartment in Brundidge. It’s next to the Pike Activities Center and Victoria goes there and to continue to hone her life skills. Victoria’s apartment is near the doctor’s office, the grocery store and the church.
“I feel very confident that Victoria can take care of herself,” Sankey said. “She keeps her apartment as neat as can be and she can cook and she’s a good neighbor. She’s doing just fine.”
On this Mother’s Day, Sankey will look forward to hearing from all her children and catching up on what is going on in their lives. Like a mother hen, she likes for all her children to stay under wing.